07/20/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17350
An arrogant professor boards a plane and gets a seat beside an old man.
Mid-flight, the professor decides to play a game with the old man and prove he’s intellectually superior, so he turns to him and says:
“Hey, do you want to play a little game with me?”
The old man looks at him and says: “Depends. What type of game?”
The professor goes on to explain the game:
“Taking turns, we’ll ask each other one question at a time. If the other knows the answer, the asker gives him one dollar, and if he doesn’t, he gives one dollar to the asker. Want to play?”
The professor grins, knowing his general knowledge is vastly superior.
To his dismay, the old man refuses! Determined to make him agree, the professor raises the stakes for him.
“If I lose, I ‘ll give you two dollars instead of one!”
“No.”
“Five dollars!”
“No.”
“Ten dollars!”
“I told you, no.”
Desperate, the professor makes one final offer: “If I lose, I’ll give you a hundred dollars, and if you lose you’ll only give me one!”
The professor pleads. The old man ponders this, and then sighs. “Only if I get to start”, and the professor immediately agrees.
“Ask away”, the professor says, confident he’ll never lose.
The old man asks: “What has five heads, forty feet, and lives inside of a bucket?”
The professor turns the riddle over in his head, trying to find anything that fits the description.
After an hour of intense concentration, the professor gives up. G rumbling, he pulls out his wallet and gives the old man $100.
He wastes no time and asks him: “So what has five heads, forty feet, and lives inside of a bucket?”
The old man smiles, shrugs and says:
“I’ve got no idea. Here’s your dollar.”
07/19/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17348
A couple had been married for 45 years.
And They had raised a brood of 11 children and were blessed with 22 grandchildren.
When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies,
“Many years ago we made a promise to each other: “
“The first one to pack up and leave has to take all the kids.”
07/18/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17346
Dad: Who do you like more, Mum or Dad?
Little Johnny: BOTH
Dad: Ok if i go to America and your mum goes to Paris, where will you go.
Little Johnny: Paris…
Dad: That means you like your mum more?
Little Johnny: No, that means i like Paris
Dad: Ok if i go to Paris and your mum goes to America ,where will you go?
Little Johnny: America!
Dad: (Angry) Why! ?
Little Johnny: Well, coz l’ve been to Paris before!
Dad: (Angry) when did you go to Paris??
Little Johnny: In the first question you asked
07/17/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17342
A small farm boy named Little Johnny was milking his cow when all of a sudden a bull came charging toward him.
As horrified workers nearby watched, Little Johnny calmly continued his milking.
To everyone’s astonishment, the bull stopped a few inches from Little Johnny, turned around and walked away.
‘Weren’t you afraid?’ one of the workers asked Johnny.
‘Not at all,’ the Little Johnny replied,
‘ I knew this cow was his mother-in-law.’
07/16/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17340
One day there was a woman who lost her cat named “LOVE.”
It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York.
So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house coat and went looking for him.
When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing,
They arrested her on the spot.
As she said very honestly,
“She was looking for LOVE.”