Daily Joke: Jokes Library

Do your homework !she said no little girl who you talk cause you going to get a beat Down

It was Christmas time and this woman invited all her family to her house to eat. So they gathered around the table and she asked her son to pray. He said: “But I do not know what to say.” She said: “Say what I said this morning.” So he said: “Dear god, why did I invite all these people to my house?”

This black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder and the bartender says,”Hey,that’s pretty cool,where did you get that?”and the parrot says,”In Africa,there’s millions of ’em!”

A couple of blonde hunters are out in the woods when one of them suddenly falls down. She doesn’t seem to be breathing, her eyes are rolled up. The other blonde whips out her cell phone and dials 911. She gasps to the operator, “I think my friend is dead! What shall I do?” The operator says in a calm soothing voice, “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure she’s dead.”

There is silence, then a shot is heard… The blonde says, “OK, now what?”

GOD is talking to Adam in the garden of eden,about the creation of a woman.

GOD; Adam how would you like to have a woman to live with you in the garden?

ADAM;What is a woman?

GOD;A creature like you but much prettier and she’ll cook for you,clean for you,keep you healthy, give you children,take care of you and never ever give any problems and please you in ways you could never ever imagine,But It will cost you…Alot

ADAM; How much?

GOD;An Arm and a Leg!

ADAM;taking a moment to think it through and after a long pause, he ask’s,GOD, WHAT CAN I GET FOR A RIB???