09/14/2024 from Daily Jokes
#18850
The Wife Ask Her Husband The Three Magical Words.
Wife: Darling, it was such a hard day. Can you tell me the three magical words that always make me so happy?
Husband: You are right.
Wife: Very funny, no, the other ones.
Husband: I was wrong.
09/12/2024 from Daily Jokes
#18846
A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the old saying,
“You can’t take it with you.
After much thought and consideration, the old ambulance-chaser finally figured out how to take at least some of his money with him when he died.
He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw enough money to fill two pillowcases.
He then directed her to take the bags of money to the attic and leave them directly above his bed.
His plan: When he passed away, he would reach out and grab the bags on his way to heaven.
Several weeks after the funeral, the deceased lawyer’s wife, up in the attic cleaning came upon the two forgotten pillowcases stuffed with cash.
“Oh, that old fool,” she exclaimed.
“I knew he should have had me put the money in the basement.”
09/11/2024 from Daily Jokes
#18843
An egg and a chicken sit in a doctor’s waiting room.
As they sitting there,
They are staring at each other.
Not knowing there is egg and chicken, the nurse is busy with her work.
Then nurse walks out of the office and asks,
“Alright, which one of you came first?”
“Seriously!” shouts the chicken,
” Here, too?!”
09/10/2024 from Daily Jokes
#18840
A man is playing with a stray dog.
His wife says,
“Don’t play with this ugly and disgusting thing!”
The husband defends,
“Come on. He isn’t that ugly and disgusting.”
The wife looks at him,
“I was speaking to the dog.”
09/09/2024 from Daily Jokes
#18837
Thomas is 32 years old and he is still single.
One day a friend asked,
“Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?”
Thomas replied,
“Actually, I’ve found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.”
His friend thinks for a moment and says,
“I’ve got the perfect solution, just find a girl who’s just like your mother.”
A few months later they meet again and his friend says,
“Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?”
With a frown on his face, Thomas answers,
“Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.”
The friend said,
“Then what’s the problem?”
Thomas replied,
“My father doesn’t like her.”