04/28/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17079
A student failed in the final law exam and decided to make a deal with the professor.
Student: Sir can I ask you one question?
Professor: Yes
Student: If you can answer this question, I will accept my final mark, if you can’t, you will have to give me an “A” grade.
The professor agreed.
Student asked: “what is legal but not logical, logical but not legal, and neither legal nor logical?”
Professor thought about it for hours and pondered, but couldn’t think of an answer.
He had to finally give up as he really didn’t know the answer.
He gave his boy an”A” grading as promised.
The following day professor asked same question to his students,He was shocked when all of them raised their hands.
He asked one student
He answered:
Sir you are 65, married to a 28 years old woman, this is legal but not logical.
Your wife is having an affair with a 23 year old boy, this is logical but not legal.
Your wife’s boyfriend has failed in his exam and yet you have given him an”A” this is neither logical nor legal. Professor fainted….
04/27/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17075
Tim decided to tie the knot with his long-time girlfriend.
One evening, after the honeymoon, he was organizing his golfing equipment.
His wife was standing nearby watching him.
After a long period of silence she finally speaks:
“Tim, I’ve been thinking, now that we’re married maybe it’s time you quit golfing. You spend so much time on the course. You could probably get a good price for your clubs.”
Tim gets this horrified look on his face.
She says, “Darling, what’s wrong?”
“For a minute there you were beginning to sound like my ex-wife.”
“Ex-wife!” she screams,
“I didn’t know you were married before!”
“I wasn’t,” he replied.
04/26/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17073
A wealthy old man was lying on his deathbed when it occurred to him he had never made a will,
So he called his lawyer to help him make his will.
The following day his lawyer came, and the wealthy man said,
“I want 25% of my money to go to charity. After all, I’ve taken, I should give something back.”
“How generous of you,” the lawyer responded.
“I’ll make sure it happens right away.”
“I also want 25% of it to go to my son. He’s been counting the days till he could get my money,” the old man said.
“Okay, I’ll make sure he receives 25% of it,” the lawyer replied.
“I want the rest to go to my wife, on condition that she remarries after I die,” the old man said.
“Okay, I’ll ensure that that happens, but may I ask why you want her to remarry? It’s a quite obscure request,” the lawyer asked.
“I want to make sure at least one man regrets my death,” the old man said…
04/25/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17071
An elephant and a crocodile were swimming in the jungle,
When the elephant spots a turtle sunning himself on a rock.
The elephant walks over to the turtle, picks him up in his trunk and hurls him far into the jungle.
“What did you do that for?” asked the crocodile.
The elephant answered,
“That turtle was the one that bit me almost fifty years ago.”
The crocodile said,
“And you remembered him after all these years? Boy, you sure do have a good memory.”
“Yep,” says the elephant.
“Turtle recall.”
04/24/2023 from Daily Jokes
#17068
A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins.
He pulls the guy over and says,
“You can’t drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately.”
The guy obliges and drives away.
The next day, the officer sees the same guy driving around with the truck full of penguins again.
This time, though, all the penguins are wearing sunglasses.
The police officer pulls the guy over and says,
“I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?”
The guy replies,
“I did, and today I’m taking them to the beach.”